Cold as the middle of January I watched you every weekend paint your toe nails in the mirror. You would fix your hair and put on your tightest dress to club hop and seduce the living breathing night. No matter the weather you and your pears were gone with It till the early morning. The same routine every weekend. You see it as fun, I see it as an addiction. You say its to have a good time, I say you want attention. When I call you never answer. I’m just trying to make sure you’re alright and you didn’t come up missing. What if the shoe was on the receiving end of all the tension? Your home girls ain’t no good. They want to destroy what you got because their lives have no handle bars. Let me shut up… No! I refuse! You had a man home that love you and now he feels abused mentally. Its 4 am and you just stumbled in intoxicated waking your kids up. Did you just throw up? Your eyes are like looking down an empty gun barrel. You were in your late 2o’s and your early 30s still abusing ecstasy. Then you come in the room all loud and get mad when I move when you try to get next to me. Breath smelling like bottom shelf liquor and cigarettes and she wondered why I didn’t kiss her. So later in life I dismissed her.