5 Billion Flukes

Moorsh…

I morn for hisses…

That use to try to snake me…

I’m on to ya…

For my safty…

 

A whole in my chests vortex…

My cerebral cortex is dieing…

 

“For asphyxiation…”

 

I Can’t die

I see…

For torture the almighty won’t let me…

 

As a kid I…

Suffered watching everyone leave me…

 

“Times changed… ”

“I’ve grown…”

 

Dad gone…

Mom gone…

No friends…

If I let you in…

Either your family…

Slash associate…

 

Never have I ever lived legitimately…

Never who I ever knew was…

 

80s baby…

Maybe baby…

I never ever even got to be a son…

 

That’s probably why…

I don’t have one…

I’ve done it all…

 

“Shorrty lo…”

 

I never raped…

No pedophilia…

Or ever lied to people I love…

Never will I…

 

loyalist…

Is my giftedness…

For real…

 

One day if I self distruct…

I can get tranquilized…

Sent to a place for the…

Criminology of my insaine…

Never to be seen…

Again…

Where Its peaceful again…

 

Living out my days of never being…

Nobodys mistreated…

Mechanical engineers…

No matter how much people smile…

Telling you they care…

 

“Narcissism…”

 

Is the blindness…

That  most people think there real…

Loyalty is translation into fake…

 

“These blue days…”

 

Thrown around by words of escape…

Mostly…

By the millennials of today…

Who has never experienced life…

Or love…

For them selves of enyway…

They just observe what the see…

Afraid that it will be them…

 

True or not…

I have to stop…

No more letting in…

For opposits on out…

I told them In 1999….

 

“You can’t handle me now!!”

 

I was the family mistake…

When I started fighting back…

Some how…

 

I’m like a rebound for conversing…

Most people are in a relationship…

They dont even no how…

Most people have or a spouse…

They don’t even no why…

 

I’m not your problem solver…

Just because I listen to there trails…

 

Talk to him/ her…

Your priest or judge…

 

Keep me out your thoughts…

So I can live in mine…

 

With out marathons… Of the same old thing… Old things never broken… Now I will break the cycling… The back peddling…

 

I’m solid with these words…

Tattooed on my spine…

In black widow venom…

Sorry…

Not sorry…

No more will I be this victim…

I’m just truly hurt by never beens…

Who never can………………..

I’m shield myself…

From turning violent…

Long dividing My everything…

What I see as…

Never was…

 

Privicy is platinum…

Mind you business and tend to yours…..

 

 

 

2 thoughts on “5 Billion Flukes

Leave a Reply

Please log in using one of these methods to post your comment:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s