(My verry first post)


Times are hard…

The only thing that keeps me going is warm blood and cold steel.

My life is complicated!

My days are darker than a solar eclipse slowly covering the moon of my life.

Until darkness…

I drink to get sleep!

I drink to forget!

Drugs now just ware off quick!

Time is suspended…

Lord forgive me for I have sinned to survive!

I will never have any regrets!

Slow me down with physical pain.

My tears will stain the concrete like blood in a dim lit hallways…

Blood stain on the sofa cushions!

Blood stains almost everywhere that there was a short story!

A battle!

I will never forget those days of war for peace.

To only loose peace of mind through my eyes!

Violence soaked in gasoline…

I find the defendant guilty of being misguided, savage and blind…

I received the chair!

Love me or kill me!

I have wounds that will never heal…

The world to me is one giant grave yard!

Me six feet deep…

Day by day…


I’m only what America made me…

I still live by faith holding my crucifix tightly in my hand…

With a stone grip!

Money still grows from hell’s tree leaves.

Hands that have roads on palms…

Hard like prison doors.

Autographed by powder burns from last night…

Sincerely time will tell!

This city is soulless undergone reruns that won’t end!

The days are interminable…

I watch a show of purgatory up to its highest volume!

Kill or be killed!

Another black male enslaved by his own funeral service…

People acting like they care with there crocodile tears…

falling to the grass…

Ashes to ashes…

Dust to dust…

How many of us will go next?

Forget justice!

Justice is just us…

Genocide from people in blue uniforms!

Am I dying or am I dead?

I can’t tell anymore…

I can’t dwell anymore…

My pain and suffering…

Just kill me already!

She loves me…

She loves me not…

She loves me…

She loves me not…

Then she pulled the trigger…

Aiming at my own heart!

Shooting me down!

Fuck it all!

Laugh out loud!

In their eyes…

we are a joke to them…

Examples will be made in this soulless parade…



(Oldie right here)



I surrender…

Speed I need!

Running and running jumping fence after fence!

My shirt got caught on the gate!

Dogs barking, police sirens, helicopters circling, hovering low with search lights in the sky!

As I try to accumulate speed!

I need more air!

The wind has been knocked out of me by five black boots!

Shining chain link badges!

Standing over me in my face!

I taste blood in my mouth!

Salty, irony, gritty blood!

It’s over…

After I regain consciousness!

I opened my eyes…

I see sharp dressed suite to a tee standing in front of me…

While I lay on a hospital bed…

Inquisitions fly at me at top speed!

They realize two days later that it was mistaking identity…

Not even a apology…

Only hand cuffs taken off me…

Even a huge hospital bill…


.45 caliber

Under cover plain cloths police were on their way to a apartment to serve a warrent for his arrest.

The officers weren’t wearing their police chain link badges outside their shirts as required by their superiors. They didn’t even look like cops.

They drove up to the apartments and hopped out there un-marked vans and cars in loads try to wash their so called dirty laundry.

On the other hand… The supposed suspect herd noises outside so he got up and peaked out of the blinds on the window and he saw a bunch of men with guns.

He tured from the window blinds and said to his lady friend who’s apartment belonged to her “who is all of these motha fuckaz out side?”

The plain clothes officers that were dress like stereotypical thugs with backwards hats and baggy jeans.

Ya…. Not much fashion sense but in there defense it was the year 2000 and this was common.


The plain clothes officers advanced to the apartments door where the suspected target was.

Two minutes later gun fire erupted like a volcanos in Chile. The supposed suspect didn’t know if the men running up to the apartments door where trying to kill or rob or worst to him and his lady friend.

They didn’t at all look like cops! The officers then started exchanging gun fire with the supposed suspect like misinformation.

Bullets ripping back and forth putting holes through the air smacking the glass windows and the walls and doors of this apartment.


Did these officers even think?!

There could had been children or animals in this women’s apartment.

But I really don’t think they even cared since they started shooting first. The supposed suspect had his two .45caliber autos squeezing there triggers rapidly like they were his first love.

Two officer were servearly injured. The supposed suspect put his guns down and surrenderd then the officer ran in the apartment and yelled at the lady and the supposed suspect to get on the grown and hand cuffed them both.

The officer then stood over the suspect and shot him 12 times while he lies on the ground in cuffs screaming helplessly.

The suspect was denied medical treatment till hours later….

Then they took him to central booking for processing.

Now! Did I mention that he didn’t know these were officers.

Oh ya! That’s right! There is no self defense law for black people. Your ass is going straight to jail no matter what the situation is.

I ask….

What would you have done in this situation?

How would you have handled it?

Men dressed like goons running up to your house with no badge shown. With regular cars pulling up to your where abouts. Not announcing they’re officers.

How would the situation gone with you?


This ain’t no spelling bee… Spelling my name out of your mouth won’t get you close to me. My history’s consistency started with small timing off of the Avenue.

A collage of car after car started to make me sea sick. Up on Blvd is where the broads never turned off tricks. Prices were negotiated from leaning on the cars window seal then she would hop in.

Quick trips to the liquor store hoping that they don’t close the door.



Now me and the guys got to pile up in the van on to the other side where the late bar would be still standing. Fast forward to a deadly shotting in front of the late liquor bars doors shutting the bar down for good.

There were more and more and more shoot outs later. Left 75% of my good nature gone up in the gun smoke of my patience. Sometimes I even ended up a hospital patient.

The girls around my way stay in drama. Plotting and scheming on the next man with big dollars. Can’t tell them nothing to save them. They just get angry, causing a scene saying things like “Don’t try to control me”!

Later on seeing her day after day getting lighter and dry coughing more. Now a fighter of H.I.V…. You know…. that house in Virginia. Just to fuck man after man because he has more bandz.

I just could never understand…

If the kids starved. They robbed and stole. As the gotten older they were stronger and boulder. Now all of them on the run from the F.B.I….

You shoot me I shoot you back! The whole neighborhood owned fire for their hands. You could never tell them that black on black crime is foolishness. They ain’t going to sit to death. They ain’t going to die no matter who it is!

Retaliation done took the lives of most groups this year. More R.I.P. tattoo’s this year.


Taking A Smooth Walk Through Insanity Park

My city is wild. If your attemting suicide just go stand outside.

I swear that there should be a law against who should have kids. When I stepped in her house she was smoking weed in front of them.

These kids will grow into teenagers. Very curious in thought. You… As a mother telling your sons and daughters not to do drugs and then go to school and get caught.

He Ran up to the window of the car. With his hoodie on… Stuck the gun inside the window. Flashing on his own kinfolk.

School after school after school… The are shutting down. Making Google there only teaching tool.

We go to jail just to have a guarantied place to eat and sleep. Honestly to me personally. Prison is safer than being on the streets.

He said… “I’m going to kill you if you ever cheat on me!”

She said… “I’m going to kill you if you ever cheat on me!”

The truth is that both of them are cheating on each other. Days later…. One of them kills the other.

You can get guns and drugs here quicker than you can get a job.

Home invasions with no patience . They left the family dead of who they robbed.

He sat there on the edge of his sofa. Spinning the cylinder of his revolver. Telling the Lord that he’s sorry. The next day… Shot and killed by police. Caught on a robbing spree. Now the end… All of this was for rent and food for his kids to eat. There are way more chapter’s to these story’s. Chapters that will make you think real deep.



I grew up on the burning side of the city, where hollow point bullets took more souls then holocaust victims. God rest their souls. Hey kids there’s a new trend that’s going on its called black on black crime. I know why but I don’t have all the answers. Police officers using P.O.W. style war tactic’s on impoverished civilians hopping out their cars on us and killing and quarantining our children while tensions are building.

I still live though I know that death waits for me on every corner and alleyway and In vacant buildings. I still survive knowing that sometimes I pray for help even though I think god isn’t listening. Drugs of all sorts and cars of all sports. Our women are forced to sell their souls for nourishment for their children and the men just disrespect them for reasons I will not mention.

I’m just saying… Ain’t no love in these children and that’s why they off killing. I feel them, and all their pain spills on the pavement. I witnessed junkies get clean in prison and come home an make millions off of John Dillinger’s occupation. My city, my hood and my life sometimes its the only way.

Death before dishonor. Hell on earth and we sip forty ounces with leather base ball gloves on. Marijuana in our systems and prescription pain killers in our blood stream just to escape harsh reality even for a moment. Please forgive us, for it was never the life we choose we just inherited the skull and bones an broken homes and a culture we will never truly know.

No love at all. Someone please help save our souls!

Help me!

Save me!

Love me! For who I am.

Dandelions And Body Bags

I feel so warm and tingly.

My every breath is in slow motion.

My voice raspy chain smoking.

While the summer breeze played the saxophone.

Like that old jazz man.

You know!

My younger days.

Dice games going on in the ally Way’s.

So you know I’m side betting.

Keeping my third eye open for guys gun toting.

Trying to rob us was suicide!

The whole north west side knew it.

My knuckles bruised!t

Cut up from last nights predicted fight.

Guess who won?

The ladies of the night.

Standing on the boulevard.

Hopping in and out of cars.

like they were jumping rope.

She asked me did I have another cigarette.

I replied..,

“I don’t smoke.”

If I could do a documentary on her life.

It would be like bringing a knife to a gun fight.

Only for the knife to win.

This was also the night that I made death run.

This was the night that change my life forever.

AR 15

Surrounded by masked men at three am…The sounds of glass breaking and loud screaming mixed with helicopter propellers and bright lights shined threw my window bright like day light. I didn’t budge because I’ve been here before. So nostalgic and not proud of it. I felt like a fish in a tank displayed for the public. When I opened my eyes I wasn’t surprised to see police men hovering around my well being. .223 and 5.56 and fingers on the triggers pointed at me. Three am… So nostalgic with white faces shouting at me. Damn! I finely realized that my life sucks and I have no one I can trust.