Oh Catastrophic

“Oh Catastrophic”

“Like us !”

Don’t dress how we use to.
Don’t keep our self up like we use to.
Don’t do things like we use to.

This is beyond depression…
Inside spirit a hollow oak tree…
Bound to a ships…
Anchor…

War inside…
No choice but to survive…
They all suggested instead…
That I…
Instead of just listing to I…
“Everybody feels like this sometimes…”
Is what’s been said

Like yoga and breathing technology will be the end all…
Please shut the fuck up!
This can’t be helped…
Sedate me…
With A mega dose…

I’m far beyond your reality…
Irritated response comes off as hatred…
Naw…
I just hate being me…
My mind comes off as vacancy…
It’s just a rundown trap house…

It’s just so full…
Of many things like raging pain in tall viles suffering, sins, stress and struggling…

To comprehend this life…
This fowl bitch ain’t for us…
It’s only designed for them…

You don’t think like me…
Move like me…
Get tired of trying to prove like me…

Stuck in quick sands open belly…
Up to the neck barely breathing…
Stop!
Don’t make a camp fire out of my…
Forest fire….

You ain’t me…

I’m not you…

My face looks like it’s stuck on violent… When it’s stuck on problems…
Ones that can’t be solved in…
A hard back dictionary…
Clinging to nonfictinary…

Why must I fight myself to end…
As a quotation after the exlimation…

Mark…

I struggle like no other…
Like a failed mission or a unfinished… Kitchen…
Black droors without utensils…
I’m tense all over…
In every sense…
Back tured counter clockwise from happiness…

Fuck it…

Exhaustion…

Stop breathing…

A nobody…

Will only be my legacy…

No one notices as human…
Us!

So they can’t miss who or what they never perceive…

Incurable…

“Like us !”

Don’t dress how we use to.
Don’t keep our self up like we use to.
Don’t do things like we use to.

This is beyond depression…
Inside spirit a hollow oak tree…
Bound to a ships…
Anchor…

War inside…
No choice but to survive…
They all suggested instead…
That I…
Instead of just listing to I…
“Everybody feels like this sometimes…”
Is what’s been said

Like yoga and breathing technology will be the end all…
Please shut the fuck up!
This can’t be helped…
Sedate me…
With A mega dose…

Finding A Way To Calm The fury With In

I’m still trying to recover…

Im still trying to get right…

I’m still falling.

Trying to grab a hold of the new ages.

A unfinished prototype of a man with no feeling and no compassion trying to transition to a normal future! Interactional and compatible rearranging my thoughts into love and not flames.                                                          I won’t go to far. Medicating between Wellbutrin and Bupropion. Sertraline to walk the type rope to hope. Please don’t fall… Hoping to God when I’m in public that know one bumps into me or look me in my eyes a certain way.                                    They say I’m fucked up… Seroquel won’t even put me to sleep. My mind skips a beat sometimes when I hear old songs. Triggering flash backs of a savage nostalgia.                                                             A child that knew no real punishment untill I met the true devil.

I don’t go far… No mirrors, pictures or clippers to shape my life up. Cutting off the ties of the guys that I once looked up to as a child.                                                 Now all dead and gone or getting high somewhere strung out creeping through the back Windows stealing only to satisfy there drug apitites.                            Some of them are doing maximum time behind the iron bars or on death row awaiting to die slow.

Can someone tell me the reason for a prison sentence of life plus 75 years? Do you have to die twice in order to come home and see your kids?

This is the prototype of a man Trying to transition.