Browning Of The Roux


“Browning Of The Roux”

Quit bitching
Folk.

You’d probably
Throw up.

All in your
Mouth till you choke.

Can I get
A witness from.

Those who
Have been.

Subjected
To all types.

Of murder
Entrapments.

Oppression,
War, discrimination,
PTSD.

Hold up
Now!

Real PTSD
From rebel enemies.

Infidels to
See your well being.

Lifeless, loving
Less, teenager’s.

Killers with Chips
in there britches.

Masked up
Then home invaded.

Ransom shit
Stripped till humiliated.

Starving for the,
Lost betters.

From a bitter
No better life.

Always, off,
Scedual…

Fuck Your
Money!!

Though my
Tribe maybe starving…

Staying on
Dope just to gets sleep!

Drinking liquor to
Heal from the beating!!

Cocaine in my
Veins, staying awake!!!

For days!!!!

To dodge all
The heathens!!!!!

And if I bleed
Today!!!!!!

You will surely be
Murdered this evening!!!!!!!

They don’t give
A fuxk what we believe in…

BITCH IM BLAXKK!

BUT TO ALL MY
OPPRESSED ALL!

AROUND THE WORLD!
PLEASE DON’T BE SEATED!

EVEN IF DIFFERENT
CIRCUMSTANCES!

YOU ARE NOT ALONE!

THOUGH WAR MAYBE
INEVITABLE!

MOST OF THE
WORLD DONT GIVE!

A FUCK ABOUT
USSS!!

OR SHIT ABOUT
WHAT WE GO THROUGH!!

SAYING AND PRAYING
AND POSTING!

IS LIKE A FAD OR
BANDWAGON!

BUT IF YOU AINT
FIGHTING WITH US!

ALONGSIDE IN US!
ANYWAY!!

FUXK YA WORDS,
PROMISES, AID,
PROTEST!

LETS FIGHT
FOR OUR SELVES!

FOR BETTER PROGRESS!

KEEP YA SMILES
AND RACE OR RELIGION!

SPLAININGS!

CALL ME WHAT YOU
WANT!

THATS ALL YOU
GOOD AT IS HATING!!!








“Why We Shoot Back”

Insanity…….

10 yr old grown men….

10yrs later…

10 become ten men…

10 out of 10, only 4 of them left..

10 year to life, some in prison for…

10 years dead or…

10 years in the feds…

4 of those 10 are left…

Those 4 even did time in prison…

For crimes they didn’t even commit…

Set up by police so it’s nothing to
Shoot back at them, before they kill
Us.

Can’t go no where, poverty issues so my family stuck.

Continuing to live life like no human being would ever want….

Never want…

As I yelled out!

“FUCKING KILL ME! I AINT GOT
SHIT TO LOSE!”

Shot down from the head, to the shoes, no one would even give a damn over lives we’d lose.

Only God knows the pain….

Of a short fuse…

As electricity cracks in the rain….

Leaving the brain to forever sink in blues…

The Last bonding… To His… To Hers…

To the paradox I once was foned of…

Tranquilized by my love for…

I bleed through bloody fist…

Punch on concept walls…

Till I fractured my wrists…

This is the final price to pay…

When dealing with the un-devoted…

Tooo free…

I don’t know what it is…

I feel like men are more into…

Commitment…

Than women these days…

When I fall out of love…

For enything…

I genuinely hate the year…

Then stand back up…

Fighting for love…

I WAS ONLY YOUR DISASTER 

(A old ass one right here)

 

 

The life you live is ethereal to me…

I will never understand it…

My life to you is the same but deeper…

See I can’t be with you…

I don’t want you to suffer…

You know me…

You no that my life is like no other…

You were just going to college…

At the same time…

I was going to jail…

You didn’t understand it…

Yet You accepted it…

You really loved me…

I was a G…

A born gangster in the eyes of the black robes that sentenced me…

For something I didn’t even do…

We where from two different worlds…

The point is…

You were to good for me…

I didn’t want to ruin your life…

My biggest way of showing you I love you was…

To let you go…

So fly away…

Become something that Ill never be…

I want you to love someone that deserves you…

More than I do…

Born in a haphazard life…

I was…

You however…

Where bought up in a beautiful Koi pond life style…

Everything just perfect.

You deserved better…

LETS FUSE TOGETHER 

(Old One)

 

I’m so in love with you…

I’m so…

In love with you…

Love is my special place for you…

I love you so much…

Even though I know you will never love me as much…

Dangerously…

I am in to you…

I want you by my side like my solid pride…

You’re my future…

Love me…

Like I love you…

Love me like your first…

Love me like cold water quenching your thirst…

Love me like short sleeves in a summer breeze…

Love me like snow flakes on Christmas day…

I shall  love you the same…

I want you to be with me forever…

I want to make a tribe with you…

I want to take off your socks…

After a long day to rub your feet…

I want to smell your vanilla scent…

As I kiss on your soft cheek…

I want to hold you tight…

Enough that you can breath…

I want to be your breath…

You exhale so you can inhale me…

I love you so much…

I love you so…

It kills me…

When we die…

I want to be buried in your casket…

So our love will never die alone…

I love you so…

So you love I…

FOREVER!

 

 

(I didn’t really like this one here) (I was going to toss it in the trash) lol! No bullst!

TRUE PAIN

(A old one)

 

 

I’ve seen death up close and personal in the worst ways possible…

Since I was five years old…

Our relationship was a road that never ended like silent hills…

Agony…

Tragedy….

Wild beasts of all kinds…

True story!

This ain’t no confession…

This is just pure raw uncut truth…

My life is like a child coming home…

To a cold vacant apartment…

With no food or heat or running hot water…

At times…

My hopelessness became my true recognition…

No ones perfect…

Not even YOU!

Remember that before you criticize someones life…

How they write…

If you only knew…

The undernourished emotional trauma he’s been through…

This man….

GLASS MIST PAINS PORTRAIT

(Yet another old one for yall)

 

 

You and me were suppose to be…

Until a sea of pain bought title waves…

Who’s to blame…

For our darkest days…

Many words were said…

Before I put you to bed…

You told me not to leave…

Why would I stay…

Your words were hurricanes…

Your actions were the same…

The past bought lots of rain…

Dark storms that came…

Your shirt soaked in tears…

My hearts deepest pain…

Then the storms came…

Over and over and over…

GOD!

The pain!

Came closer and closer…

Driving me insane…

No blue sky’s for us…

No sunny days…

Ever came…

Your shirt soaked in tears again…

I’m sorry!

I can not stay…

Trying to please you will kill me…

Who’s to blame…

WHO I SAY?

These will always be…

My darkest days…

Please…

No pain for me…

I wont become your slave…

Lord knows those were my darkest days…

For that I blame…

All those rainy days…

The rainy days….

Bright thunder storms…

That came…

Love… is… pain…

Love… is…

(PAIN- 1 any unpleasant bodily sensation produced by illness, accident etc. 2 MENTAL SUFFERING!!!!)

THE GHOST OF RELATIONSHIPS PAST

 

(Another one of my favorite oldies)

 

Remnants of you still remain in my minds open plains. A field of open lies, broken ties! Torture that left my eyes blind to what I have seen!

 

Yet you still leave your foot prints all through my head. I can still feel you close when your not there. You where the true air of the throne! baring my naked lonly heart….

 

Your scent still pervades off my red bed sheets! Dark side on the other side of my bed were my Queen use to sleep… The next women in my life will always be the archetype.

 

Of you…

 

My feeling’s for her will be the same as ours were…

Its not fair!

I don’t care!

I still want you!

Next to You…

Possessed the unprepossessing me…                                                                                  You took over me…                                                                                                                  You weaken me…                                                                                                                    I couldn’t sleep…

You would make me…                                                                                                             Your love was a vaccine to me…                                                                                          I haven’t dated in three years…

knowing another women would just see the pain in me…

The shame in me…                                                                                                                  The rage in me…                                                                                                                       No taming me…                                                                                                                       You still haunt me…

I’m not me…

A GHOST!

You….

Are….

To….

Me….

Naked… Exposed… Unforgiving…

She would say…

“please!” ”

“Don’t leave me lonely! ”

She would tell me…

“Please come home and hold me!”

She would say…

“Please!”

“Just pick up the phone baby!”

She done said…

“please!”

“I know I was wrong baby!”

She has said…

“Please!”

Just come back home to me!”

Truthfully…

I’d rather be lonely…

Sentenced to invisibility from you…

Owning visions of me mentally…

Visions blurred…

Eye lids closed…

Reopen to see you be narcissistic…

In the mind…

Through optical lenses…

You’ve killed me more than once…

Maybe ten times…

Each time never resurrecting fully from each…

I’m still so destroyed…

Incomplete…

Desperate self construction…

I’m snatching off my sheets…

Exposing the nudity I feel…

For all to see…

For all to broadcast…

By open air waves…

While channel surfing the nightmares…

Seeing myself exposed…

I am on T.V…

I seen me…

What you’ve done to me…

It plays back the tapes over…

You know what…

Those mindless pill popping actions…

Not to judge…

I was never your man….

Until I would leave you alone…

I chained my feet to stone…

Through myself over the bridge you called my home…

Our home…

You never thought about me first…

So why do you want me now when I’m done and gone…

Leaving comming back as many times then whatever the end of infinity is…

Oh…

One last request before the coffin closes…

Keep all your fucking I need you baby bullshit to yourself…

While I just stay by myself…

Till my heart fully opens…

Again…

You Will Never Be Honorable

 

THE ART WORK YOU SEE.

IS FROM MY GOOD FRIEND MEHWISH!

Of MMaccidentallearnings wordpress!

 

 

You don’t even have a centimeter in thought of what you’ve done to me!  You pulled the worst out loaded Action words! Squeezing the trigger putting multiples in me…….

I bleed…

When you die… Keep me out of your eulogy! I’d rather swan dive in to a swimming pool full of killer bees!

Then to be the next face you will see! The last time I seen you. You had the audacity to say!

“Can we talk about you and me?”

You and who!?

Who are you!?

Your the enemy!

Slowly like abusing amphetamines! You fed on my unstable sanity! Damn it he!

Damn it me!! What were you thinking! Chasing the only remains left of your own free mind down the street!

While you stayed on Instagram then converted over to checking your tweets! I was outside scrambling! In the war zone packing heat!

Constantly moving around so we could have something fridgerated to eat…. I was swindled jump the pit falls of belittled by moving to fast on the eyes.

If I’d had stayed still.  Just a few minutes.  Making my every move gental.

I would have probably seen that the love You so called had for me. It was only a rental! You never had any love for me!

You spent me around in a complete 360….. For what gain!? To much pain!

From my neck up to the back of my brain stim! All the headaches, fights over who controls the landscape! The bike trail left where my vital arteries use to be!

Now mentally in ruins!  You! In debt trying to pay off loyalty unproven! You really tryed to be slick. With your weak attempts to corner me.

All you manage to do was kill yourself out of my life horribly!

Unhonorably discharged……………..