To Audition For Solar Energy

On this
Down to Her
To yield..
the brightest..
Into the flames..
Of lightning..
My eyes from
Behind my
Eyes lids..
Them quickly
I’m not afraid..
To touch
The polit
The rays have
Grazed my
Till I’m
engulfed in
Her smile..
No choices..
A wild
fires a
A triangular
My heart
From the
Hips rotation..
sixty degree..
In her eyes
My Words are
On contact..
No preservatives..
her minds..
Unsaid Times..
I’m upset
Dying to..
See one last
past in
My dirrection..

A Chefs Thesis

A chefs thesis

Moving hills…
I need some…
to smooth…
out these bills…..

Inhumane folk tails…
I can be to…
like Pecos Bill…
Built to sabatoge…
That how I feel…….

Live from…
David’s shield…
No weapons formed…
Against me will……..

I might go crazy if I relapse off. The smells of fear on the upper tiers. praying for my enemies. They know not nothing of how I was built. Or how things can get real. Prices up and down like broken digital scales. That’s life so…. Keep it moving or give ’em hell! No obligations! They say we are bad influences. To raise our boys to become men. Well……. How the fuck can they become men? Our world is a Ghetto. Not letting anybody walk in or leave out. Ghettos of the world, slums, beat up stray cats and loose dogs. Survival is what is tought before we could even tie our shoe laces up! I want our people to live free! To breath fair air! To drink water that’s clean. Kick bad habits that plague our broken dreams. It seems to inhabit the planet. To witness to habitats we damage. From see men and women slaughtered! Raped, robbed or tortured!
To all my slums and ghettos in the world! places going to war over territory’s that are there’s. Politics and drugs! Hunger can turn people into gangsters and thugs. The only gangsters we know are the founders, the worst police and crooked judge’s!


I don’t give a fuck if you from

Eastern Europe,
Sudan ,
Thailand or India,
Uzbekistan, Pakistan, Kazakhstan
All the stans,
small towns in Russia,
Uganda, Nigeria,
Tanzania, Madagascar,
Toronto, Alberta, Newfoundland,
Nunavut territories.
Detroit, Baltimore, chi town,
new York and buffalo,
New Brunswick, southcentral,
watts, Inglewood,
Compton California,
Mexico, Venezuela, Brazil
Haitian or Cuban,
Trinidad & Tobago,
Peru, West Indies, puterico,
South africa, Somalia,
Iraq, Iran, Israel,
Southeast D.C,
Miami, Fort Lauderdale, Tampa,
The Turkish,
The whole world has slums and ghettos! Let us Unite with each other!
For the future of the children, our wellbeing, our families if we have them!

Smelling Salts

Just give me a dose

So I don’t overdose

Forget it

Let me comatose

Crochet my fingers into a rope

Mind locked its self behind the door

So how can I get out

Let me win

I’m stuck

Throw the sheets over my only motive to live

Give me a dose

So I don’t overdose

The mind says overdose instead

Hands shake when

I pick up things

Even a cup to drink

Fabrics drenched in Arabic coffee


Opposed to hot like I wanted it

I left it sitting on my table for to long

Eyes like rockets fuel burning

Under smoke

Trying to get a taste of a second hand

Slapped away

I don’t want your created pavement

To curl up on anyway

Give me a soft couch Cigarette in my mouth


And a small dose

So I don’t overdose

Stopped searching for the lost lists of me

Indeed I be the unholy

I know it

Sometimes to bold to be told

I have only days to live

Without cancer

I’m the cancer and a council

Of councillors in my surroundings

Funny how I can be a councillor yet, I can’t council me

Can’t nobody

I can’t use myself to cure

What I am

Or nobody

Placad at my face values like valumes



Then face my low values

Phrase it to graze on my

Pains immortality

I battle with everything, anybody

People just don’t understand

You couldn’t ever understand a person like


So stop

Persons like me just need

You to not

Just be there to hold

The mental and grow

Pleaded no sympathy

Fractures the light that once to glow

Just listen to me

Whenever I ever

Need the me time to wait for our time

Speak in a small dose

Because to be honest

I’d rather just overdose

Then to be told

I will be ok

Just give me a small dose of

Being there

Two Deadly Yet Equal A True Lovers Pastence

“A Throw Back From 2017″



The Real Bonnie and Clyde…

The untold story…

Me and her were two bullets in a chamber of a 9mm. Never jamming the gun. She sat on the bed yelling to the kids running late for school. “Lets make it!”making them move faster before they left out the house.

I was on the floor with my back to the bed right by her feet. Caramel skinned complexion toes I wanted to bite. I sat on the floor counting money and putting it in the laundry basket so I can get ready to leave. She knew I still had beef with the guys up the street. They all knew that this little lady was just as tough and as dangerous as me.

She sat on the bed humming the song she likes. Loading a machine bullet after bullet. Placing each one slowly in the clip with a Newport cigarette at the end of her lips dropping ashes on the tattoo on her hip. Burgundy bandana tied around her head and a burgundy bandana around the back of the barrel next to the trigger.

God! She was as thorough as they came. My true equal finally I’ve met my match. I got up and through my burgundy and black North face jacket on. Before leaving out of the spot she looked at me with her hazel eyes with a sad expression on her face and said. “Daddy be careful out there because you know it’s hot.”

I replied back saying. “Not as hot as you are lamb chop, please make sure you hold down the spot.” she said to me. “Just call me if something goes wrong and I’ll pop up and spray the damn block up.” She would with no conscience to… I said back to her after giving her a kiss on the lips. “Don’t worry about me babe I got this thing on lock”

I was 23 and she was 27 and I kept a burgundy bandana folded up in my back right pocket with her Nick name on it….











There is a very real untold story behind this…..

Running Truth Never Lies…

“One of my throw backs from 2017”








Carpet bagger….


Cotton picker…



You people…


Ghetto trash…

I’ve been called it all! It doesn’t even faze me anymore! Tell me what you no about pain! I’ll show you me and my ancestors scars!

I was young when I paused and heard…

“Run nigger run!”

The color of there faces I’ll never forget…

I was 20 years old when I was beaten…

Run for what? I can’t even run for president…. I can’t even show you I’m better than! Without some folk putting down a man…

Can I speak for a minute…..


Those words are what hurt the most… Did you forget that we came her before! Most of y’all on boats….

Oh god….

Let me shut up there! I know y’all don’t want to hear that old sad story…




I won’t call you that or blind to the facts….

You can see!

I promise I won’t talk about that case…

I’ll just yell

“about face!”

Speaking to myself in the clear mirror about a raped race….

Just to myself though…

So don’t panic…

Can I get a witness?

What’s up my native American brothers?

What’s up my Muslim sisters?


I think it just never existed…

So from me!

It’s just not worth mentioning….

Racism doesn’t exist….

I’m being sarcastic!

What’s up Donald trump?

What’s up communism?

What’s up to all these new prison systems they’re building…

That’s the new section 8…

Rent free…

You understand me?

Oh don’t get me wrong!

They’re building them for us…

I’m just dreaming…

Sleep walking fast to the back of the bus…

In 2017….

What’s up Rosa parks?

What’s up justice?

“What’s up Chris?”

Oooohhh…. Snap!

Justice you do speak!

Can you free all my soldiers! Free all the walls that seem to block the very eyes of the already formed generations of the blind deaf and dumb… The shameless cobras…

Let my people go!

We have suffered enough…

Witness please!

Soon again they will all be on the receiving end…

True with a side of justice is coming!

True justice is not pleased! There will be examples made to all these genocidal thieves…

Conceal your blood line please!

Im being Sarcastic again…

So wake up….


R.i.p to all the miss treated, murdered for no reason…

Free all the victims of the broken system…

I love you all!




(My verry first post)


Times are hard…

The only thing that keeps me going is warm blood and cold steel.

My life is complicated!

My days are darker than a solar eclipse slowly covering the moon of my life.

Until darkness…

I drink to get sleep!

I drink to forget!

Drugs now just ware off quick!

Time is suspended…

Lord forgive me for I have sinned to survive!

I will never have any regrets!

Slow me down with physical pain.

My tears will stain the concrete like blood in a dim lit hallways…

Blood stain on the sofa cushions!

Blood stains almost everywhere that there was a short story!

A battle!

I will never forget those days of war for peace.

To only loose peace of mind through my eyes!

Violence soaked in gasoline…

I find the defendant guilty of being misguided, savage and blind…

I received the chair!

Love me or kill me!

I have wounds that will never heal…

The world to me is one giant grave yard!

Me six feet deep…

Day by day…


I’m only what America made me…

I still live by faith holding my crucifix tightly in my hand…

With a stone grip!

Money still grows from hell’s tree leaves.

Hands that have roads on palms…

Hard like prison doors.

Autographed by powder burns from last night…

Sincerely time will tell!

This city is soulless undergone reruns that won’t end!

The days are interminable…

I watch a show of purgatory up to its highest volume!

Kill or be killed!

Another black male enslaved by his own funeral service…

People acting like they care with there crocodile tears…

falling to the grass…

Ashes to ashes…

Dust to dust…

How many of us will go next?

Forget justice!

Justice is just us…

Genocide from people in blue uniforms!

Am I dying or am I dead?

I can’t tell anymore…

I can’t dwell anymore…

My pain and suffering…

Just kill me already!

She loves me…

She loves me not…

She loves me…

She loves me not…

Then she pulled the trigger…

Aiming at my own heart!

Shooting me down!

Fuck it all!

Laugh out loud!

In their eyes…

we are a joke to them…

Examples will be made in this soulless parade…



(A old one)



I’ve seen death up close and personal in the worst ways possible…

Since I was five years old…

Our relationship was a road that never ended like silent hills…



Wild beasts of all kinds…

True story!

This ain’t no confession…

This is just pure raw uncut truth…

My life is like a child coming home…

To a cold vacant apartment…

With no food or heat or running hot water…

At times…

My hopelessness became my true recognition…

No ones perfect…

Not even YOU!

Remember that before you criticize someones life…

How they write…

If you only knew…

The undernourished emotional trauma he’s been through…

This man….


(A Oldiiiieee)


I just came to believe that words can kill. Negative criticism sucks!

I try to act like what people say doesn’t bother me. Truthfully it does.

I cant lie in hordes to myself! Hold my head high!

The things people can say can crush you! Before you even know you’ve been tarnished!

Laugh off insults… You know what I mean!

When some one says something mean to you in a joking way. You just sit there and laugh it off.

Knowing it just put a bullet hole in you. The mental scares that words can open.

One that no Band-Aid or gauze can cover up.

Sealing up the wound. I found out that…

Even when people so called joke with you.

It hurts…

Let’s face it!

There is always some truth in a joke. Like a drunk persons quotes.

I just laugh it off though. When really I want to get angry snapping on the inside!

I’m way weaker than I ever thought… I really don’t care what people say about me.

Who am I kidding words hurt!
You don’t understand the damage.

You don’t have to hit me or shoot me to hurt me… You don’t have to talk about my problems out loud like its a big joke…

You don’t have to smile and laugh at my discomfort… Stop and think before you say something to someone!






If I get mad… Then all of the sudden…

I’m the bad guy! You don’t even realize you made me this way!

All because you wanted to so called make jokes. Well Im not joking!

I’m not fucking laughing! So miss me with your weak jokes!

horrible quotes!
Miss me I quote…




(One of my favs oldies)



It’s only one of me…

I’ll fight all ten of y’all!

I can’t think!

Anger brewing tattooing a image of bruises on you!

I don’t even know why I am so mean sometimes…

Why I have bad dreams, flash backs of bullets coming threw my wind shield!

The life of my passenger taken…

Lord have mercy!

Rest in peace!

Your enemy has taken a permanent nap!

Don’t like my book…


You think you tougher than me…


The only person I fear is the man in the mirror!

No big words twists turns or metaphors…

Just true facts intact…

Verbally waterboarding you to death…

A mind that seen know Christmas or thanksgivings!

With family members!

Just fist fights!

Small iron battles in the middle of the streets!

Cold prison sentences…

23 and 1… 24/7

With no nice bed sheets or throw pillows…

So what does life mean to you!?

Mine is a constant fight for survival!

Post traumatic stress disorder is my only friends and family….

Distant Hearts

(Another oldie)


Love was never easy to keep for a guy like me.

I was always In the hood ready for war.

Outside with boots laced ten toes down.

Your lips whenever you would smile.

All I wanted to see.

Even If It was for one last time.

If I could see you face to face right now.

I would pull you so close to me!

Wrap my arms around your waist!

Pick you up in the sky!

Then kiss your soft moist lips.

Priceless were those times.

I spent with you.

Oh how brief they were yet unforgettable.

I knew you were the one for me!

I was also one with the streets.

I can remember when I went on that iron vacation up north.

It was cold…

I was lonely…

Yearning for your affection…

Your letters to me…

I would read over and over…

That was enough for me!

That was all I needed!

Thank you for caring!

Your last letter…

The lowest day of my life…

Dead I was Inside…

At the same time…

I was understanding to your needs.

Wants that I couldn’t give to you.

My circumstances…

I still remember your last words…

“I’m sorry.”

I was alone once again.

I didn’t cry though…

I promise you…

I just started reading more eating, gaining weight and exercising!

To get you out of my head…

Time passed…

I came home with nothing but a screaming hole in my heart…

I never saw or herd from you again…

Crumbling my young heart…