Please! Don’t Read This! This Is The Worst Shit I’ve Ever Wrote

Ya I cursed! Violent talks and walks through the dust storms. I love all of your positive speeches. I love all of your pictures of Sandy beach’s. I dug a bullet out of his chest with a steak knife and my finger nails. I know I ain’t shit and I never will be so don’t have pitty for me just listen to me. What? I bet you just think I’m downing myself. Just check my track record or Google misery. I was sixteen the first time I snorted a brown dream. I’m sorry but everything just can’t be perfect in your life! Or is it? Maybe you never had to steal to feed your siblings. I’m not hating! I’m glad you can take trips. I can’t cuz I have felonies so I can’t get a passport. The good old USA…. FUCK DONALD TRUMP AND THE KKK!!!!! Racist to me just because I’m black watching neo Nazis March on Washington D.C…… What the fuck is going on! Hold up! I fucked up… This was suppose to be positive. What I wrote was suppose to make you see who I really am… Or some shit! Fuck it… I fucked up again and again, and again and again…. Filled caskets while you sat home cozy hand crafting wicker baskets. I’ll just watch the pictures of you going to college or graduating or some shit. I’m sincerely glad that you made it. On the flip side where I reside prison pictures in the yard with other inmates for making chancey mistakes. Oh fuck! Is chancey a word? I don’t care…. It will be today! I made being me fashionable. You stole it to perpetrate. If you really knew how we live across the train tracks. You would shed a tear for every time I gotten booked for a misdemeanor charge went to bail review and got a no bail then got sent back to jail to rot in hell. Anyway… I’m so proud of you and your remarkable success… For real! I’m not hating at all! I guess we all went to jail because we didn’t want to starve. My mother was just happy that I survived in there all…. That’s it…. If you got questions… No comment! The 5th!

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To Succeed At Light Speed

On top of a cold mountain peak is where you’ll find me. The freezing temperatures are like a father. My insulated winter coat hugs me like a mother. Three months it took for me to see. The very top of the mountain peak. I’ve always went where no man would dare go. Even if it meant walking through six feet of thick white snow. Their were no seven dwarfs at the top. Just a flag from someone else marking the rarely seen spot. I’ve made it through so many avalanches. At least up here I don’t have to pay taxes. I went straight to the top like your favorite hit songs. Doing what I had to in order to survive the blizzards and snow storms. I’ve seriously came far enough in my life. To me this is only half way. I’ll keep walking as far as the skylines the very next day.

I know I’m only human but nothing will ever stop me!

Broken Dinner Plates And Miss Information

I kissed her on the bus stop bench. Her lips tasted like karma… I mean caramel. She miss four busses that night in my to my touches. Pointed to stars in the sky watching them die. Sky scrappers turn into unfinished papers written by the hands of Cupid. I was so stupid… Savage and ruthless… No tattoos but many scars to prove it. She knew it… She got cold and unzipped my green north face jacket and wrapped herself up in it. My chin was where her head had been. She looked up and diabolically smoked at me. I asked her what she was smiling so hard for? She just said… I don’t know I just want you around more. Sweet like sugar straws but she was lethal like shooting up raw. She always knew just how to find a good vane to stick the needle in. A feisty little demon blind of betrayal and it’s purest form. The last bus came and I started to feel strange this was a feeling I just couldn’t explain. I felt cold steel under my chin and seen a been flash at the end then she said with that evil grin. That’s the last bus you’ll ever see for cheating on me!

To be totally honest… Believe it or not….

I never ever cheat for any reason on any season. To me that’s worst than not breathing. So I just closed my eyes and waited for her to squeeze it…………..

 

Fading Nostalgia

I’m fresh out of the house of corrections. Back up on the block. Dodging torpedoes and the crooked time out.

Thugged all the way out. With gold teeth shining almost blinding. It should be a crime how fly I am right now.

Beef and broccoli timberlands. Brand new unlaced so they won’t choke. North Face jacket with hard plastic in my pocket.

Boot cut jeans. I couldn’t do that tight skinny jeans shit! My brown and green sweater from old navy.

My brown gap hat with courage imprinted on the front. Cell phone going off on my hip equals more money.

I was 22 or maybe 23. Somehow I must have known magic. I litterally made a quarter million disappear. I ain’t going to lie though… Somehow I miss those days when all of my guys were here.

We took a picture that day. It was 32 of us. If I could take that picture now. There would be (not including me) there would be only six of us…….

I guess death and permanent incarcerating knew magic too. I kind of Miss those days when we would all walkthrough the streets 30 deep.

We stopped cars walking to the gas station. I miss my guys….

R.I.P. All the guys! Free all the guys too!