Tying your last tie

“I just can’t stop”

“So many tears”

“I literally haven’t cryed this much in years”

“Tears so thick”

“Tears so fucking thick”

“Pardon my language”

“My eyes welled over into trees”

You’ll never no how much you ment to me…

Your father is…

My brother….

Fuck…

Pardon my language….

I’d die 1,000,000,000 ties….

For you to take my place…

I don’t know…

All I can remember right now is…

When you were born…

I haven’t cried so hard in years…

I feel like mother earth…

I feel like “Emit Till…

I feel like “Malcolm X”

I feel like…

Fighting for all that is left….

Negro wake up…

But I know I am…

All that matters…

To me brother…

Is us…

My family…

My lasts…

My firsts…

Your child has past…

He won’t come back…

I don’t know how to feel…

So I’ll just let my tears…

Roll back in my head…

He’s on level…

Place up now…

My neff…

Stronger then I ever was….

Your birthday is two weeks from now….

My smile has burned its self down…

I’m hurting…

So bad…

If my tears could talk…

Fuck it…

They Would be bleeding instead…

It’s all in my fucking head…

Pardon my language…

Pardon…

My grammer….

Pardon the things I can’t and won’t fix…

Literally….

My ashy hands are two damaged….

This one is real personal…

Yet, I have to share it….

Get it off myself…

Crashing trying to take off my seat belt…

If I didn’t…

Post…

Anything…

Fuck it…

Pardon my language…

“To my god son Carlos jr, aka Jr”

“I will forever miss you shorrty”

“I’ll miss you”

“I love you boy”

“I’ll see you when I get there”

I’m From L. N. G.

“BOULEVARD GO HARD!!”

 

 

Riding pass…

Yelling out of there cars…

 

 

This will be…

Thee last time I’m…

Doing this role call…

 

 

Edgewood!

Midway!

Springdale!

Norfolk!

 

 

They all know who I is…

They all no…

The bizz…

Noooo jokes…

 

 

West forest park!

Fairview!

Grantly!

Garrison!

 

 

Back then…

I was terrible…

 

I was known to…

I played pool…

Alot…

Hit me up on my cellular…

For eight balls…

In the corner of your pockets…

For those corners…

 

 

I was the best…

Every sales fell in line..

For there orders…

 So embarrassing…

 

 

Liberty heights!

Chattam and Carsdale!

Denison!

North Hilton!

 

 

Scrambled boy…

In double O’s…

Ready rock city…

Where fiends…

Panhandled…

Up at the gas stations…

 

 

Callaway!

Arydale!

Wood Haven!

Bonner Road!

 

Night walkers scheme…

Strong arm robbery…

Breaking…

Entering…

 

 

Children…

With automatics…

No safty…

 

 

“Go mode!”

Carlisle Avenue!

Bateman Avenue!

Alton Road!

Piedmont Ave!

Damn brats…

Lord knows…

I love them all…

Girls and boys…

Don’t play with toys……

At the age of 14…

They are into the streets beefs…

Older men…

If you young men…

can live past there 20’s… 

You’ll be on that…

Original gangsta…

Raffled…

 

Gwynn Falls!

Ellamont Street!

Clifton Avenue!

Wallbrook!

 

 

You can get murdered…

For a small fee…

For selling somewhere…

You should not be…

A skimpy bag of grocerys…

 

 

O…

Possibly…

Get your your pockets… emptied…

You’ve been taken…

 

Powhatan!

Hanlon Park!

Allendale!

Chelse Terrace!

 

 

Looking at somebody…

For more then…

The 5 second rule…

Bullets will certainly…

Fly in your direction…

The furnace…

 

 

Fairfax!

Oakfield!

Kathland!

Granada Ave!

 

 

Rest in peace…

To all of my soldiers…

Who won’t be…

Comming back…

 

 

 

Main Ave!

Berwyn ave!

Egerton Rd!

Dorchester!

 

 

Mega hard white…

Brown sugar or that tan…

Broken down…

Into the corners…

Alleyways…

Testers given…

The early morning applause…

 

 

Berrington Rd!

Sequoia Ave!

Belle ave!

Borman!

 

 

Kidnapped…

Tormented…

Tortured…

Ransomed off…

Over white squares of…

Numbing soft…

 

Where…

Those young bucks…

Steal bikes…

Throwing rocks…

At mormons…

 

Off porches…

 

 

West Cold Spring!

Oakford Ave!

Ridgewood!

Fern hills!

 

 

Shoot outs…

Bad deals…

Bad pills…

High heels…

That wave hello…

 

 

Broad day…

Police…

The Dt’s…

Shaking up pepper spray…

 

 

Ex pills…

Percocet prescriptions…

Xanax bars…

Unpaid bills…

 

Penhurst Ave!

Eldorado Ave!

Belvieu!

West belvedere!

 

Don’t trust no one here…

Most girls around…

Are everybody’s girlfriend…

 

 

Bad…

Hearts…

Vicious Fights…

Plegue break…

Out…

Between boys…

Men…

When they find out…

Who she’s been sleeping…

With…

 

 

Intercourse…

With both…

No remorse…

She just smurks…

 

Face..

To whoever lost that fight…

He’s comming right back…

 

Wild wild west shit…

 

Rite back there…

 

 

Groveland!

Dolefield!

Elderon!

Wabash!

White oak!

Crestfield!

Yosemite!

Copley Rd!

 

Love does not exist…

At all…

 

Traffic stops unlawful…

Hand cuffs to tight…

Wrist bleeding…

Leaving permanent scars…

 

Rats can’t come back…

Thee..

Tattle tails get brutalized…

 

Wolcott Ave!

Westchester!

Miami Place!

Fordney Lane!

 

 

Hot…

 

 

Abusive relationships…

Left both…

Men..

Women..

Dead…

 

 

Long ride downtown…

Homicide building…

You better run…

Board a plane…

Something…

 

 

Grown men…

 

Well..

We had more heart then them…

As children…

 

 

Bullets flying like…

“Jiu jitsu” kicks…

 

 

Little girls..

So sassy…

With there little hands…

On there hips…

 

 

Young boys…

8 years old…

Carrying condoms…

 

 

On the corners…

Loose cigarettes…

Marijuana out on the strip…

 

“A yo”

“Holla at shorrty!”

“He got that diesel out yalll!”

 

“Big dimes!”

“Big dimes!”

 

Ain’t no picnicking…

Ain’t no romancing…

No slow dancing…

 

 

First dates mean…

Motel recipt…

Credit or cash…

 

Bring your home girl to….

 

 

 

Library’s…

No books read…

The kids take advantage…

Are only there…

Of the free WiFi …

 

 

Facebook-en-off…

Perverted…

Instagram picks…

Ass…

Tits…

 

Narcotics detectives can…

Hit the block so quick…

You’d have to…

 

“Holllldddd What you got!”

Or swollow those those things…

If they catch you…

They’ll beat you bloody…

Yelling out…

Saying things like….

 

“Open your fucking mouth!”

“Raise up your fucking tungue!”

“You little bitch!”

 

 

About…

Let’s see…

50 Dirt bikes flying through the streets…

 

 

Tinted windows…

On vehicles…

Car…

Caravans…

 

Creeping slowly down the one way street…

 

 

Deviously…

 

 

Go Grab your heat…

Out of the stash…

Or lay…

On your ass…

 

 

Pistols…

Russian assult rifles…

Pokers out…

Swung from tall grass…

Vaccent houses…

 

 

223’s…

Hollow points…

Teflon chest protecting…

Now Its war…

 

 

Midnight Half gallons…

“Jack Daniels…”

Warm whiskey…

On cold mysteries…

You feel pissy…

 

 

All night party…

On the block…

Clocked in…

trap hours…

 

 “What hood you from!?”

“Throw your sets up higher!”

No shook replies……..

 

“I’M FROM L.N.G!”

 

 

 

The U.S. Zoo

“Artwork done by me.”

 

 

 

Mistreated!

How can you!

Even call yourself!

A God fearing!

Dropping kids!

In!

Private prisons!

 

Killing fields!

 Domestic terrorism!

The people in power!

Ignore symptoms!

Throwing focus off!

Those beautiful!

 Hard working!

Human beings!

 

Crossing over!

The border!

 

They have no say so

Over there

Own kids crying!

 

Dieing!!

DIEING!!!!!!!!

DIEING!!!!!!!!

 

Having!

No say so!

From hundreds!

Of miles!

Away from!

 

 

I want to cry!

Sometimes!

If it were all the time!

 

 

I want to!

Seriously!

Adopt!

Every last child!

Torn apart!

From there families!

Bring those families!

Up higher!

Reunite them one by one!

With!

There!

Mom’s and dads!

If I could rob!

The government!

For a billion dollars!

They would  all!

Have free housing!

Health care!

From the harsh!

Brutality!

Violence!

Turn my self in!

To authorities!

Just to give them all!

A better running starting!

For the chance to smile!

 

 

No more badges!

Or round ups!

Like wild animals!

Torn apart from!

labeling!

Crying for freedom!

Seeking asylum!

For every childs!

Grand future!

 

 

 

Envisioning!

Violence!

When they dream!

Problems!!

They see!

 

 

These are not!

Sick dogs!

Or!

“Look at the flowers!”

Till blood falls! 

 

 

They will never be!

 

Treated!

 Unfairly! 

Inhuman element!

By sick disturbing!

Badges!

Handed over from!

Racist!

Politicians!

 

“Let those kids speak!”

Stop covering!

There mouths!

If you notice!

There Families never!

Get the chance!

To be heard!

By a reporter!

Riddle me that!

God!

I hate being a American!

 

POVERTY!

WAR!

THE STRUGGLING!

THEY ONLY SHOW!

THE ATTRACTION FOR TORRISTS!

FUCK FACTS!

FUCK STATISTICS!

YOU WELL NEVER FEEL OUR STRUGGLES!

TILL YOU COME HOME WITH US!

VISIT……….

💯💯💯💯✊✊✊✊

 

 

Love’s Slave

“Throw back from 2016”

 

 

 

Can I have some kisses….

Sweet like Dragon fruit…

Dripping juices from your summers retreat…..

I’m so high off your love….

I’ve injected your romantic…

While eyes stare into my eyes…..

I’m weak for you…

I know you want round two…

With your knees trembling…

When you hear my timberlands…

Moving closer…

To your intergalactic space that…

I would like to travel light years to…

Invite me through you solar system…

Squirting milky way…

I will make your meteors show all over me…

Please!

 

 

My only desire is to…

Treat you with the means of respect…

I’ll lay you down in the gardens of Eden…

Planting my…

First seed…

Into furtal grounds…

Watch as you bare our beautiful fruits…

While we properly nourish them ripe…

In tuned with life…

Together forever…

One day…

Lets lock lips till winter comes our way…

Let your sweet, rich valley…

Is that place for me to taste…

Dig your nails in my back…

When I pull closer!

Embrace…

In your heart I will be caged like a lion…

Swallowing the only key to my escape…

I’m trapped in your thought’s!

You’re the chains!

Bounding me to your love bug that I caught…

Hold me tight wrong or right…

No!

This ain’t for one night!

I am loves slave!

You!

Only you!

Posses the key to my release…

KEEP THEM!

IM HAPPY TO BE YOUR SLAVE LOVE!

Rare

Love songs…

In the wrong…

I told her…

Dont bond me out…

 

Save your money…

I sat in there for 5months…

Came out with my plastic…

See through bag of stuff…

 

The first person I seen…

Was you…

Thanks…

 

 

Remembering the days…

Where word was the bond…

Rest in peace…

Words just create wrongs…

 

I like old fashioned songs…

Fighting for what’s right…

Heated hand figures left scars…

On me and them…

 

I trusted my sins…

My sins kept me alive…

Even when I thought…

I was going to die…

 

When I came out of that…

Fight…

The first person I seen was you…

Thanks….

 

 

 

Can I ask…

What keeps you living…

For me…

It was dope and pistols…

 

Quotes and food stamps…

Making it back up town…

Cut up…

From flipping in that car crash…

 

Naw I can’t dance shorty…

Not with this mac in my pants…

So she tought me how to slow dance…

Soon after that…

 

A true romance…

 

Did we ever do pick nicks…

Or hold hands…

Naw…

We sold nicks and brown grams…

 

No matter what….

She was allways there…

She loved me because I never feared…

So she learned not to ever fear…

 

When I allways needed to feel…

Love…

Compassion…

Some action…

Attachments…

That gave me the will of life…

One life to live for…

blocking fake soap operas…

There for you…

I’d die with you…

I’d die for you…

After that final day…

I finnaly learn to feel the rare love of a human being…

Rare love…

 

Fighting for your life…

When you looked up…

I was there…

I still am…

Love…

 

High Praises part #2

“high praises to the love In yalls hearts”

 

 

To all the women who stand up for the men like us…

This is the last thing I’ll say…

I just hope you can understand me…

 

 

A mans heart isn’t determined by what he has or the wrong he’s done.

A real mans heart is determined by him protecting his loved ones.

The sacrifices so everyone else can get what they need first.

His will to stand tall for his family wrong or right!

Taking risks for us if needed.

His word is his bond solid.

His actions not his vocals.

For Example!

Showing his love rather then saying it but when he says it he means it…

His ambition to make things right from his wrongs.

To Tell the truth even if it hurts.

To listen, take care of you in sickness or bad heath.

and more………….

 

 

To all the real women left!

Thanks for your love! Believing men like us can be better! Helping us and never belittling us because you may have more together.

Thank you so much from the bottom of my heart!

Our hearts!

 

 

MAN!

To the guys who have this RARE type of situation… Don’t abuse it! Feed it nurture it and keep her! Don’t lose her!

By here excepting you…

That’s the biggest blessing!

Peace!✌

 

THE END!

High Praises part #1

“TO THE LOVE IN YOUR HEARTS!”❤👏

 

To the good women!

The real women!

To the women of a dying breed!

Don’t die on me!

Don’t die on us!

 

 

Hey!

If your man treats you right. Even if he’s a have not. Low income or no income. Till he gets the pavement under him. The momento to run on his feet.

I’ll leave it at that.

Raise you love at the card table…

When you look at a man for what he’s got. The promotion from his good job. The best of income… Great school education with no traces of incarceration. High chances are that this man can be the one for you or the one who breaks your heart.

Not saying all men like this☝. I’m saying that it’s more statistical for these types to be arrogant assholes who only care about there needs.

Hidden Gems!

The over looked hidden men. The men who need good women by there sides. Some love and attention deminishes the hot side. The women that leave motivation for you on a clean plate…

“Loyalty is Royalty!”

How I see it…

They ignore and judge the have not or hard knock… Judged before even met or to see where his head is mentally. Over looking can also lead to a something having, nothing ass man….

Something…

Having…

Nothing…

Ass…

Men….

 

I feel like a man wounded by life… Will appreciate the angel in his light more. When all he ever experienced was devilish torture. Wounded beyoned life’s choices. No Choices with out excuses until you’ve lived were that mans shoes were…

Please…

Don’t judge us by facial expressions or gold teeth… By the minimal options left he’s had… Leading him to be a over looked nothing. When he actually might be more intelligent then you think….

When…

He…

Acually…

Might…

Be…

More…

polite…

And…

Intelligent…

Then…

You…

Think…

 

God bless the hand full of women!

Who don’t care!

About that!

And care!

About us!

Still loving her man unconditionally no matter what they say…….

Thanks and high praises to the ones that are!

 

 

TO BE CONTINUED😎👌

 

Pages Of Deja Vu

My dreams when I lay hung from trees from painted face.

Will I ever grow traces of lifes born crisis in order to let go of my camouflaging?

Shaking in a corner with news papers on the floors.

I saw ever homicide I’ve seen…

Faces I can’t ignore…

From 5 to the age now at my door…

The race car crash past!

Cell extractions with batons, shields and mustard gas…

They used chemical warfare on us…

Now that’s what I call domestic terrorism…

Pissed off ready to hurt enybody in my vision…

They took away all my priceless valuables…

Even the pictures of my family members…

Mistaken identity on identified the right rong guy!

They planted dope on us and fucked up our records…

Being on a wanted list at 14 was my ambitious way to make bad memories…

They all payed…

I’m still in pain whenever I do finnaly sleep…

Dried up tears on my black pillow cases try to still fit in as a civilian.

I still get anxiety from hearing certain noises…

Still judged when they don’t even no him…

Ask him…

He will tell you…

Just stay for a while and I’ll give you my story…

Lacerations All Over My Time

Forgetting I chose

to live alone…

 

My external Feeling surrounded by white walls, 2 bathrooms and a kitchen…

I hold myself as a silo tied to sheets soft like wonder bread. Nothing in easy sent next to or under my rib.

Forgetting I chose

to live alone…

 

Mind vaccent boarded up adjacent from Nonsense and fallowing false relations. Can’t trust a pretty face and ass to match.

Average Joe… I was a high ranking street organization breading ravens and crow’s. Use those two ears boy so you can listen more than you talk a statistical lie in status quo.

Forgetting I chose

to live alone…

 

Rural living is what I said I really needed to get away from the murderous heathens. Who am I fooling! To no I was raised to no longer be breathing…

She can’t live with me… She would never understand why I am this way. Damn! I am alone clutching polymer everytime I hear the slightes tone to spray…

Forgetting I chose

to live alone…

 

Understanding that I chose….

To…

Live…

alone….😧

I WAS ONLY YOUR DISASTER

(A old ass one right here)

 

 

The life you live is ethereal to me…

I will never understand it…

My life to you is the same but deeper…

See I can’t be with you…

I don’t want you to suffer…

You know me…

You no that my life is like no other…

You were just going to college…

At the same time…

I was going to jail…

You didn’t understand it…

Yet You accepted it…

You really loved me…

I was a G…

A born gangster in the eyes of the black robes that sentenced me…

For something I didn’t even do…

We where from two different worlds…

The point is…

You were to good for me…

I didn’t want to ruin your life…

My biggest way of showing you I love you was…

To let you go…

So fly away…

Become something that Ill never be…

I want you to love someone that deserves you…

More than I do…

Born in a haphazard life…

I was…

You however…

Where bought up in a beautiful Koi pond life style…

Everything just perfect.

You deserved better…